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The Ten Commandments: 5. I Was Only a Child

Anneloes grows up in a devout religious subculture in the Netherlands, within the Reformed Congregations. Her childhood is marked by a strict observance of Sunday rest, the absence of television, and the belief that men are the head of the household.

Twenty-five years ago, Anneloes reported sexual abuse within her family. However, the accused were acquitted, even on appeal.

At the age of sixteen, she spoke out publicly for the first time, but when her story was met with denial, she suffered a severe mental breakdown. This led to years of institutionalisation in various psychiatric clinics, including months spent in solitary confinement. Due to an offence, she was examined at the Pieter Baan Centre, the Dutch national forensic psychiatric observation clinic, where it was determined that she had grown up in an extremely unhealthy family system.

Now, twenty-five years later, Anneloes asks those directly involved to reflect with her on her fractured life and explores the meaning of concepts such as love, loyalty, and security. When does an upbringing in an isolated subculture become control, manipulation, indoctrination, or even abuse of power?

I was only a Child is a film about a woman who, as a child, became trapped between different systems. Through reflective, confronting, and heartrending conversations, she attempts to make sense of what has happened to her since she first spoke out.

It is part of a documentary series on the Ten Commandments, produced by DOXY Films and EOdocs, in which ten filmmakers each give their take on one of the Commandments. Geertjan Lassche ventured into the fifth commandment: ‘Honour thy father and thy mother.’

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