Daniel de Castro Gonçalves, born with an undiagnosed disability, embarks…
8 Stories About My Hearing Loss
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- Citation
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Diagnosed with bilateral sensorineural progressive hearing loss in the first grade, Charo Mato became fully deaf by the age of 23, and received cochlear implants against her parents’ wishes. Structured with eight distinct stories and questions, Mato’s autobiographical documentary flits between childhood stories and digressive memories, the scientific and medical explanations of hearing loss and implants, and poetic ruminations on the nature of life and language. Mato uses the film to process her own experience. A beautiful, highly personal film processing and celebrating the experiences of those with hearing loss.
Citation
Main credits
Mato, Charo (film director)
Mato, Charo (screenwriter)
Mato, Charo (film producer)
Mato, Charo (on-screen participant)
Olascuaga, Eugenia (film producer)
Baracco, Valentina (film producer)
Other credits
Cinematography, Tomás Ridilenir; editing, Camila Muhafra; music, Maximiliano Silveira.
Distributor subjects
Biography; Disabilities; Women; South America; Human Rights; Culture + Identity; Family; Body Image; Health + Aging; SociologyKeywords
00:00:00.583 --> 00:00:02.583
To the unconditional ones:
Claudia, Sofia and Fernando
00:00:02.918 --> 00:00:04.000
-Much.
-Much.
00:00:04.168 --> 00:00:05.625
-Little.
-Little.
00:00:06.293 --> 00:00:08.375
-In front of.
-In front of.
00:00:08.750 --> 00:00:10.875
-Behind.
-Behind.
00:00:18.750 --> 00:00:21.043
-That's it?
-That's it.
00:00:21.293 --> 00:00:24.043
-Let's read another one.
-Oh! We're missing one!
00:00:25.125 --> 00:00:28.583
Kite.
Kite.
00:00:28.833 --> 00:00:31.083
-Kite.
-Kite.
00:00:33.333 --> 00:00:35.418
-Robot.
-Robot.
00:00:37.250 --> 00:00:39.668
-Teddy bear.
-Terry bear.
00:00:40.083 --> 00:00:42.083
Teddy bear.
00:00:42.250 --> 00:00:43.875
Terry bear.
00:00:44.043 --> 00:00:45.958
No! Teddy bear!
00:00:48.043 --> 00:00:50.125
Teddy bear!
00:01:02.833 --> 00:01:04.958
Produced by
Charo Mato
00:01:05.125 --> 00:01:09.043
No, this is...oil.
00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:11.333
No, look, it's oil.
00:01:13.250 --> 00:01:14.375
Charo?
00:01:15.583 --> 00:01:16.918
Look at Daddy.
00:01:18.208 --> 00:01:20.418
Charito? Look at Daddy.
00:01:21.333 --> 00:01:22.375
Chari?
00:01:23.625 --> 00:01:26.125
Written and directed by
Charo Mato
00:01:27.625 --> 00:01:28.668
Open...
00:01:28.875 --> 00:01:30.043
Pen...
00:01:30.375 --> 00:01:32.418
No, open!
00:01:33.043 --> 00:01:34.208
Open.
00:01:34.375 --> 00:01:35.793
Closed.
00:01:35.958 --> 00:01:36.918
Clos.
00:01:37.083 --> 00:01:38.168
No, closed!
00:01:38.333 --> 00:01:39.250
Crosed.
00:01:39.418 --> 00:01:40.793
No, closed!
00:01:42.208 --> 00:01:43.918
I don't understand...
00:01:44.458 --> 00:01:46.668
-Repeat after me: "Clo..."
-Clo...
00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.668
-...close...
-...close...
00:01:49.918 --> 00:01:51.833
-...closed.
-...closed.
00:02:00.250 --> 00:02:05.708
EIGHT STORIES
About my hearing loss
00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:16.958
I wonder how to start,
00:02:17.375 --> 00:02:20.250
these words were not
part of my plans,
00:02:20.793 --> 00:02:24.458
but writing to you
may be the way of doing it.
00:02:24.918 --> 00:02:26.293
One, two and...
00:02:27.168 --> 00:02:28.793
...there!
00:02:30.543 --> 00:02:33.500
There's so much
I want to tell you!
00:02:40.500 --> 00:02:41.918
May we come in?
00:02:42.458 --> 00:02:43.833
A slice of cake...
00:02:44.083 --> 00:02:47.125
I thought my film was ready,
but it wasn't.
00:02:47.293 --> 00:02:48.708
You're not in it.
00:03:00.708 --> 00:03:03.083
I wish things had been different.
00:03:04.793 --> 00:03:07.125
Less arguing.
00:03:15.875 --> 00:03:17.543
1. The Diagnosis?
00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:23.875
Progressive bilateral
sensorineural hearing loss
00:03:30.543 --> 00:03:32.833
I'm turning 30.
00:03:34.833 --> 00:03:37.793
What I know is what you told me.
00:03:40.833 --> 00:03:44.418
I was born on a cold Saturday
in the fall of 1990.
00:03:47.293 --> 00:03:49.583
Your water broke
right before leaving
00:03:49.750 --> 00:03:51.918
to a family dinner at Dora's.
00:03:52.500 --> 00:03:56.708
They rushed to the clinic
in a yellow Taunus.
00:03:57.375 --> 00:04:00.875
Dad drove down the avenue
waving a white hankie.
00:04:02.458 --> 00:04:06.543
You were wearing
a woolen dress, also white,
00:04:07.293 --> 00:04:09.083
which got soaking wet.
00:04:27.918 --> 00:04:29.458
The day you were born...
00:04:30.333 --> 00:04:33.668
...I worked all day,
did all sorts of stuff.
00:04:33.958 --> 00:04:38.208
We were about to move house
and I think that...
00:04:39.375 --> 00:04:41.833
...I'd been on my feet all day.
00:04:48.500 --> 00:04:51.750
Godparents, are you ready
to help the parents
00:04:52.375 --> 00:04:55.168
in their duty as Christian parents?
00:04:55.333 --> 00:04:56.375
We are.
00:04:59.333 --> 00:05:03.208
Contractions told me
I had to stop
00:05:03.458 --> 00:05:05.543
which I hadn't done all day.
00:05:05.750 --> 00:05:09.543
That day, I'd woken up at 8 am
and it was 11 pm...
00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:13.543
You were born at 11.30,
I had just stopped at 11.
00:05:18.125 --> 00:05:21.250
Whenever you told me this,
you would highlight
00:05:21.418 --> 00:05:23.458
I was set on being a Taurus
00:05:24.250 --> 00:05:27.625
since a few minutes later
would have meant being a Gemini.
00:05:27.918 --> 00:05:30.668
You said it so many times
that I came to think
00:05:31.125 --> 00:05:34.958
maybe if I was a Gemini
I wouldn't have hearing loss.
00:05:37.958 --> 00:05:40.625
They say us Taurus are stubborn.
00:05:41.833 --> 00:05:43.793
I guess you were right.
00:06:02.418 --> 00:06:05.918
You loved saying
that I was an undocumented baby.
00:06:06.208 --> 00:06:08.293
That it took 6 months
to register my birth
00:06:08.875 --> 00:06:11.208
because the name you chose
was banned.
00:06:12.293 --> 00:06:13.708
Oh, no! They're fighting!
00:06:15.375 --> 00:06:16.708
Chari!
00:06:20.208 --> 00:06:22.000
And you filed a lawsuit
00:06:22.250 --> 00:06:24.750
so I got a name
no one had heard before.
00:06:25.083 --> 00:06:26.293
Charo!
00:06:26.625 --> 00:06:27.708
Give it to him.
00:06:28.750 --> 00:06:30.083
Give it to him!
00:06:33.458 --> 00:06:37.668
Happy birthday to you
00:06:37.875 --> 00:06:41.668
Happy birthday, little Charo...
00:07:03.958 --> 00:07:08.333
I don't remember
my first-year teacher well,
00:07:09.418 --> 00:07:11.625
but it was her who noticed
something was off about me
00:07:11.793 --> 00:07:13.208
and called you.
00:07:19.250 --> 00:07:21.043
I could solve Math problems
00:07:21.208 --> 00:07:23.750
but I wrote nonsense
during dictations.
00:07:25.793 --> 00:07:27.708
My mind would make everything up.
00:07:28.750 --> 00:07:30.625
I empowered it to do so.
00:07:33.543 --> 00:07:35.000
Look this way, little clown.
00:07:39.833 --> 00:07:43.418
Then, I was able to write
through lip-reading.
00:07:46.168 --> 00:07:48.208
Hey, clown!
00:07:48.375 --> 00:07:49.793
Clown!
00:07:56.333 --> 00:07:58.418
2 to 9. Take one.
00:08:02.708 --> 00:08:06.418
-Alright, Dad. You may start.
-OK.
00:08:07.250 --> 00:08:09.208
Don't mind the camera...
00:08:09.875 --> 00:08:13.083
Today's dish is...
00:08:14.000 --> 00:08:15.833
...seafood spaghetti.
00:08:18.293 --> 00:08:22.963
Garlic, mussels, prawns, clams,
00:08:23.130 --> 00:08:26.168
tomato, white wine...
00:08:26.708 --> 00:08:29.625
...staple Italian food...
00:08:30.500 --> 00:08:33.043
...served here, in Buenos Aires.
00:08:37.418 --> 00:08:39.583
I've never felt deaf.
00:08:41.000 --> 00:08:43.083
Even though I am. In fact...
00:08:43.375 --> 00:08:47.500
...I embraced deafness
because of you.
00:08:49.500 --> 00:08:52.293
I had never felt like a deaf person
00:08:52.543 --> 00:08:53.875
but not out of denial!
00:08:54.125 --> 00:08:55.918
Well, maybe I was in denial.
00:08:56.168 --> 00:09:00.043
But I hadn't attached to it
the significance
00:09:00.875 --> 00:09:06.543
and implications that came
later, you know?
00:09:12.543 --> 00:09:13.708
What did you and Mum do
00:09:13.875 --> 00:09:15.333
when you knew
about my hearing loss?
00:09:16.708 --> 00:09:19.958
I knew you'd ask.
I've completely blanked out on it.
00:09:21.125 --> 00:09:24.333
I don't recall, honey. I don't.
00:09:24.458 --> 00:09:28.833
I do remember
looking into hearing aids, but...
00:09:29.668 --> 00:09:31.375
...I don't remember shit.
00:09:32.458 --> 00:09:33.708
I don't.
00:09:35.668 --> 00:09:37.918
I think that for Mom...
00:09:41.458 --> 00:09:44.958
...although it didn't torment her,
00:09:45.125 --> 00:09:49.750
I mean, she wasn't like
"my poor daughter is disabled",
00:09:50.083 --> 00:09:53.793
in fact, it was the opposite.
00:09:53.958 --> 00:09:58.043
Neither of them ever treated you
as if you were disabled.
00:09:58.458 --> 00:10:00.833
They didn't see it as a disability.
00:10:01.000 --> 00:10:03.543
Us family, never saw that way.
00:10:03.833 --> 00:10:07.083
That wasn't the attitude we took.
00:10:07.250 --> 00:10:11.750
For some families,
you know, it's a tragedy.
00:10:12.043 --> 00:10:14.293
Having hearing or vision problems.
00:10:14.750 --> 00:10:18.375
It's a stigma. But neither
of them treated you that way.
00:10:22.375 --> 00:10:25.375
So, Leandro,
whose name tag do you have?
00:10:33.583 --> 00:10:36.668
-And you, Rodrigo?
-Sebastian's.
00:10:45.458 --> 00:10:46.793
When at age 6,
00:10:47.000 --> 00:10:49.583
I was diagnosed
with moderate to severe
00:10:49.750 --> 00:10:52.293
bilateral sensorineural
hearing loss,
00:10:52.458 --> 00:10:55.458
I asked you what those words meant.
00:10:58.458 --> 00:10:59.875
Lights out!
00:11:06.918 --> 00:11:10.083
I didn't know that time
and hormonal changes,
00:11:10.708 --> 00:11:14.168
would inevitably
lead me to deafness.
00:11:16.293 --> 00:11:18.208
After you were tested,
they told you
00:11:18.375 --> 00:11:23.418
it was a genetic condition by which
you would gradually go deaf.
00:11:29.793 --> 00:11:32.458
We parents refuse to face the truth.
00:11:34.250 --> 00:11:38.125
Our children are perfect.
No one can say otherwise.
00:11:39.000 --> 00:11:42.750
They have to impose it on you.
00:11:49.500 --> 00:11:51.708
We are in constant denial.
00:11:52.168 --> 00:11:55.168
Until you're forced to confront it.
00:12:00.668 --> 00:12:04.583
I think of the unknown threshold
that keeps us apart.
00:12:08.168 --> 00:12:12.125
And the moment I knew
it what the threshold of words,
00:12:12.583 --> 00:12:16.958
when they explained me
the results of my first audiometry.
00:12:18.125 --> 00:12:21.625
They said I'd still understand
language for a while,
00:12:22.168 --> 00:12:25.083
but eventually, I no longer would.
00:12:34.083 --> 00:12:36.625
Doctors came and went,
00:12:37.168 --> 00:12:39.500
you were very nervous.
00:12:43.168 --> 00:12:44.750
You were told to relax.
00:12:45.333 --> 00:12:49.793
That I already knew how to talk,
and that was the hardest part.
00:12:51.958 --> 00:12:53.668
When I first tried the hearing aid,
00:12:54.250 --> 00:12:58.833
they asked me to describe
what I heard: voices, noises.
00:13:01.333 --> 00:13:03.918
Those were their voices,
the usual ones,
00:13:04.293 --> 00:13:06.083
but not anymore.
00:13:07.418 --> 00:13:09.583
I could not define it
until I started to say:
00:13:09.875 --> 00:13:12.668
"I feel your voice inside a cave,
00:13:12.833 --> 00:13:16.293
and there is a radio
in the background badly tuned."
00:13:23.375 --> 00:13:26.125
Hearing that way wasn't bad,
but it was odd.
00:13:26.293 --> 00:13:27.793
I didn't want hearing aids.
00:13:28.750 --> 00:13:32.750
I'd be the only girl at school
with that weird gadget.
00:13:34.043 --> 00:13:38.918
I was so afraid of being mocked
that I told you and Dad,
00:13:39.125 --> 00:13:42.083
that I'd rather use one hearing aid
hidden from sight
00:13:42.250 --> 00:13:43.583
than two more powerful
00:13:43.750 --> 00:13:46.293
yet less
aesthetically pleasing ones.
00:13:53.875 --> 00:13:56.750
I was a child who didn't
still know how she'd hear.
00:13:58.500 --> 00:14:01.333
And how hard it'd get
along the years.
00:14:06.250 --> 00:14:08.543
2. The Threshold of Words
00:14:08.750 --> 00:14:11.708
How do we understand language?
00:14:29.168 --> 00:14:31.208
It'll be a silent film.
00:14:37.458 --> 00:14:39.668
How did you and Grandma
deal with it?
00:14:39.833 --> 00:14:40.918
Any memories?
00:14:41.083 --> 00:14:42.293
How do you mean?
00:14:42.668 --> 00:14:43.625
Dad's hearing loss.
00:14:43.793 --> 00:14:45.250
Why didn't you get him
a hearing aid?
00:14:45.458 --> 00:14:47.793
Don't ask me that. I mean...
00:14:48.333 --> 00:14:50.250
It's not that...You know?
00:14:51.000 --> 00:14:52.958
Maybe she can explain it better.
00:14:53.250 --> 00:14:54.625
We assimilated it.
00:14:55.875 --> 00:14:57.708
Alright? It was never an issue.
00:14:57.875 --> 00:14:59.833
In his daily life...
00:15:00.708 --> 00:15:04.168
...with his siblings,
at home, he was normal.
00:15:04.543 --> 00:15:08.375
The problem blew up at school.
Attention problems.
00:15:09.250 --> 00:15:11.250
His trouble tuning in.
00:15:11.793 --> 00:15:14.750
It started there.
But the hearing aid...
00:15:24.168 --> 00:15:26.333
Alright.
Please, have a seat.
00:15:27.333 --> 00:15:30.708
You'll hear some sounds
through these headphones.
00:15:30.875 --> 00:15:33.543
Some will be very soft.
00:15:33.625 --> 00:15:35.958
Raise one hand
as soon as you hear something.
00:15:36.043 --> 00:15:38.125
-Put it down when it stops.
-OK.
00:15:43.250 --> 00:15:44.208
There.
00:15:58.750 --> 00:16:00.208
I was in the fifth grade.
00:16:00.543 --> 00:16:04.125
I remember my teacher.
A very large woman. Huge.
00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:07.918
She told my mum
I was getting distracted too often.
00:16:08.543 --> 00:16:11.000
Teachers can tell...
00:16:11.333 --> 00:16:15.125
...a distracted kid is having
sight or hearing trouble.
00:16:24.793 --> 00:16:26.418
So, my mother...
00:16:26.708 --> 00:16:29.668
...took me for an audiometry.
00:16:31.918 --> 00:16:37.918
On our way there,
I knew I'd have my hearing checked.
00:16:38.750 --> 00:16:40.708
I told my mum
00:16:41.293 --> 00:16:44.208
that I could hear
grandma's watch tick
00:16:44.418 --> 00:16:47.333
with one ear,
but not with the other.
00:16:47.918 --> 00:16:49.708
-Can you hear me talking to you?
-Yes.
00:16:49.918 --> 00:16:51.625
I'll be telling you words.
00:16:51.918 --> 00:16:53.500
Repeat whatever you hear,
00:16:53.668 --> 00:16:56.125
even if it doesn't
make sense to you.
00:16:58.293 --> 00:16:59.708
-Car.
-Car.
00:16:59.958 --> 00:17:01.333
-House.
-House.
00:17:01.875 --> 00:17:03.668
-Table.
-Table.
00:17:04.543 --> 00:17:06.250
-Roof.
-Roof.
00:17:06.458 --> 00:17:08.208
-Book.
-Book.
00:17:08.543 --> 00:17:10.375
-Laugh.
-Cough.
00:17:11.833 --> 00:17:13.958
-Ruler.
-Roller.
00:17:16.000 --> 00:17:17.625
-Bed.
-Bed.
00:17:18.418 --> 00:17:19.500
Hair.
00:17:21.918 --> 00:17:22.958
Car.
00:17:25.958 --> 00:17:28.375
Hand.
00:17:33.250 --> 00:17:34.333
Alright.
00:17:42.250 --> 00:17:43.500
From what I gather,
00:17:43.668 --> 00:17:45.875
your first audiometries
are from 1983.
00:17:45.958 --> 00:17:48.168
Then some more in 1998,
and now this one.
00:17:48.293 --> 00:17:50.208
The one from 1983
00:17:50.708 --> 00:17:52.208
meant to prove I was deaf
00:17:52.375 --> 00:17:54.750
so I could skip
the military service.
00:17:55.083 --> 00:17:58.543
I was told that
I might lose all hearing
00:17:58.708 --> 00:18:01.250
if I had to train at a gun range.
00:18:01.543 --> 00:18:05.583
I don't remember
why I had one in 1998. Go figure.
00:18:05.958 --> 00:18:08.583
-Probably a routine checkup.
-I guess so.
00:18:08.750 --> 00:18:10.875
-Would you say...
-Hold on.
00:18:11.293 --> 00:18:15.293
It was because I'd been diagnosed,
so they wanted to check on you.
00:18:15.458 --> 00:18:18.168
-That's right.
-Can we go back a bit?
00:18:18.625 --> 00:18:21.750
Okay. Let's do a second take.
00:18:27.375 --> 00:18:33.918
No one in the family ever felt
you weren't listening to them.
00:18:34.293 --> 00:18:35.458
It was never an issue.
00:18:35.625 --> 00:18:37.958
That was really subjective.
00:18:38.583 --> 00:18:42.875
People could tell you didn't hear
when they talked to you from behind.
00:18:43.043 --> 00:18:47.293
-Right.
-Face to face you always did fine.
00:18:48.375 --> 00:18:51.583
No one in the family
ever doubted your hearing.
00:18:52.083 --> 00:18:54.208
Acoustic reflex.
00:18:55.000 --> 00:19:00.000
It didn't seem so serious
as the idea we have of being deaf.
00:19:00.168 --> 00:19:03.708
-Right.
-Charo's a whole different thing.
00:19:03.875 --> 00:19:07.708
She wouldn't hear you
even when you were in front of her.
00:19:07.918 --> 00:19:09.125
It was different.
00:19:09.293 --> 00:19:15.333
I can see that your left ear
outperforms the right one.
00:19:15.833 --> 00:19:17.918
There's hearing loss
in both, though.
00:19:18.083 --> 00:19:18.793
I know.
00:19:19.000 --> 00:19:21.668
Look at the 1,000 frequency,
which is crucial
00:19:21.668 --> 00:19:25.458
to know where the limit
of words lies for you.
00:19:25.625 --> 00:19:27.418
You can understand words
00:19:27.583 --> 00:19:30.668
if that frequency
is above 50 decibels.
00:19:30.958 --> 00:19:34.418
It's barely there in one ear,
in the other it's lower.
00:19:34.750 --> 00:19:37.833
Which means
you can get away with it.
00:19:37.958 --> 00:19:40.293
You can manage.
00:19:40.625 --> 00:19:45.708
Based on this audiometry
and to stop any further loss,
00:19:46.333 --> 00:19:48.168
a hearing aid would be ideal.
00:19:48.668 --> 00:19:52.500
I'll be using hearing aids
about ten years from now.
00:19:52.668 --> 00:19:55.083
When my hearing worsens with age...
00:19:55.625 --> 00:19:57.583
...and I still want to hear things.
00:19:57.958 --> 00:20:01.250
For the time being,
my hearing is fine, considering.
00:20:01.793 --> 00:20:04.543
Under the circumstances,
it's not a big deal.
00:20:36.083 --> 00:20:38.625
The songs we heard with that first
hearing aid
00:20:38.793 --> 00:20:40.793
are still my acoustic memories.
00:20:44.208 --> 00:20:46.418
Two or three
are enough for me.
00:20:46.583 --> 00:20:47.958
One was Uncle Jose's song.
00:20:48.333 --> 00:20:49.918
He'd pick me up and sing:
00:20:50.625 --> 00:20:52.125
"Something in your face
fascinates me,
00:20:52.293 --> 00:20:53.793
something in your face
gives me life,
00:20:53.958 --> 00:20:57.043
I guess it is your smile."
00:21:00.918 --> 00:21:02.333
And your ballet and records
00:21:02.500 --> 00:21:05.168
to teach your dance lessons
in Bolivar.
00:21:05.625 --> 00:21:08.833
"¿Dónde están los ladrones"
and "El amor después del amor".
00:21:16.125 --> 00:21:18.543
Water is a strong memory.
00:21:18.833 --> 00:21:22.918
I feel it was born
when you took us to see the whales.
00:21:25.293 --> 00:21:26.918
I can feel the tide
00:21:27.083 --> 00:21:29.375
and wake up
with the frozen southern sea
00:21:29.543 --> 00:21:31.083
crashing on the rocks.
00:21:35.625 --> 00:21:37.043
The breathing of a whale
00:21:37.208 --> 00:21:40.083
almost soaking my hearing aid.
00:21:42.543 --> 00:21:46.875
I feel the sea in its silence
and its noise,
00:21:47.875 --> 00:21:50.293
even when there is nothing left.
00:22:00.208 --> 00:22:02.333
3. Genetics?
00:22:02.500 --> 00:22:04.250
My blood
00:22:18.250 --> 00:22:20.750
She liked a story,
so one day I said:
00:22:21.125 --> 00:22:24.875
"Let's turn off the light
and I'll tell you that story."
00:22:25.083 --> 00:22:27.333
Arancha replied:
00:22:27.833 --> 00:22:31.625
"Don't turn off the light,
or else I can't hear you."
00:22:53.833 --> 00:22:56.333
I'm Aranzazu Agustina Salgado,
00:22:56.875 --> 00:22:59.708
Asuni Senior
and Manuel Salgado's daughter,
00:23:00.083 --> 00:23:04.083
Rosy and Luis
and Dora and Manuel's granddaughter,
00:23:04.250 --> 00:23:07.083
Mariela and Valeria's sister...
00:23:08.418 --> 00:23:10.000
...and...
00:23:10.293 --> 00:23:12.583
...part of this lineage...
00:23:13.750 --> 00:23:16.418
along with my cousin Charo here...
00:23:17.500 --> 00:23:21.543
...and other hard-of-hearing
cousins in our generation
00:23:21.708 --> 00:23:24.125
and of previous generations.
00:23:29.875 --> 00:23:35.333
I remember sitting
very close to the TV
00:23:36.625 --> 00:23:41.750
and getting frustrated because
I still could not hear it.
00:23:43.043 --> 00:23:45.793
Especially cartoons...
00:23:46.668 --> 00:23:52.708
...since you can't read
the characters' mouths.
00:23:53.625 --> 00:23:56.793
-And Ara? There she is!
-Hello.
00:23:59.250 --> 00:24:02.958
Arancha was the first, you know?
00:24:03.125 --> 00:24:05.668
Your dad had had
poor hearing as a kid,
00:24:05.833 --> 00:24:08.958
which doctors
blamed on the mumps.
00:24:11.125 --> 00:24:12.458
Arancha!
00:24:14.958 --> 00:24:19.043
I would call her name
and she didn't turn around.
00:24:19.458 --> 00:24:21.125
But she could be confusing.
00:24:21.293 --> 00:24:23.958
Maybe she was upstairs showering
00:24:24.293 --> 00:24:26.958
it started to rain
and she would say:
00:24:27.543 --> 00:24:29.583
"Listen to the raindrops."
00:24:40.168 --> 00:24:44.543
I would like to offer
this ritual prayer
00:24:44.875 --> 00:24:47.583
you and I are about
to say here today
00:24:48.833 --> 00:24:52.793
for all hearing-impaired beings...
00:24:53.333 --> 00:24:56.083
...especially our lineage...
00:24:57.375 --> 00:25:00.625
...so that the generations
to come...
00:25:01.583 --> 00:25:05.293
...can live without hearing loss.
What about that?
00:25:05.958 --> 00:25:10.833
I didn't start seeing it
as a flaw overnight.
00:25:11.250 --> 00:25:13.958
I guess it happened naturally.
00:25:14.458 --> 00:25:16.500
Hearing loss, I mean.
00:25:16.833 --> 00:25:20.793
Also, as a child
I was like a sponge,
00:25:20.958 --> 00:25:22.958
so I learned to read lips
00:25:23.125 --> 00:25:26.125
and no one fully realized
I couldn't hear,
00:25:26.375 --> 00:25:30.293
as lip-reading allowed me
to reply to them.
00:25:30.625 --> 00:25:32.668
If they called me I would turn
00:25:32.833 --> 00:25:34.625
or I'd listen when it rained.
00:25:34.793 --> 00:25:37.043
So, they didn't fully get
what happened to me.
00:25:49.750 --> 00:25:51.583
What an idiot. Indeed.
00:25:54.043 --> 00:25:55.668
I taught myself how to read lips
00:25:55.918 --> 00:25:58.043
by observing people's mouths.
00:25:58.293 --> 00:26:00.793
Working out
where they place their tongues.
00:26:10.708 --> 00:26:12.418
I also feel that...
00:26:13.833 --> 00:26:17.958
...not being able to hear
anymore was confusing.
00:26:18.208 --> 00:26:20.458
I didn't really know how to...
00:26:22.833 --> 00:26:25.833
...how to process it,
emotions got stuck in my body,
00:26:26.043 --> 00:26:27.708
I became a child with anger issues.
00:26:28.333 --> 00:26:30.875
I was mean to other beings.
00:26:33.875 --> 00:26:39.833
-Like Sofi and me.
-Sorry for my abusive behavior.
00:26:40.625 --> 00:26:45.083
-You were really bossy.
-"Do as I say!"
00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:48.708
See? That's what I meant.
00:27:12.333 --> 00:27:18.000
Suffering from hearing loss
prevents me...
00:27:18.333 --> 00:27:22.458
...from having all the conversations
I'd like to have.
00:27:22.875 --> 00:27:26.250
I'm afraid of going off topic,
00:27:26.418 --> 00:27:28.583
or misinterpreting things.
00:27:28.833 --> 00:27:32.543
Unless I'm around people I know,
00:27:33.000 --> 00:27:36.000
I restrict my conversation.
00:27:56.958 --> 00:28:01.500
Once, Martin was at our place.
00:28:02.500 --> 00:28:05.708
I called his name
and he didn't turn around.
00:28:06.793 --> 00:28:09.168
I said: "This kid can't hear."
00:28:10.750 --> 00:28:15.168
Then, when he was six,
the school called Marita
00:28:15.333 --> 00:28:17.875
and she came asking
for Arancha's tests.
00:28:18.333 --> 00:28:25.000
Both of them had exactly
the same problem.
00:28:25.958 --> 00:28:29.543
And then you came along,
suffering from the same condition.
00:28:30.793 --> 00:28:33.000
In vocals and guitar,
Andres Calamaro.
00:28:45.043 --> 00:28:47.625
I got my first hearing aid at 12,
00:28:47.833 --> 00:28:49.625
when I was in 7th grade.
00:28:51.583 --> 00:28:54.833
I had a hard time
adjusting to it
00:28:55.083 --> 00:28:57.458
and admitting
my hearing problems.
00:28:57.793 --> 00:29:01.083
I gradually became aware of it.
00:29:03.418 --> 00:29:07.458
Martin's was a more severe
case of hearing loss,
00:29:08.500 --> 00:29:11.625
and I gradually realized
I was in a similar situation.
00:29:12.668 --> 00:29:15.250
Especially when voices came
from behind.
00:29:15.918 --> 00:29:18.375
This made me
a real target for bullies.
00:29:19.000 --> 00:29:20.708
-Really?
-Yes.
00:29:21.375 --> 00:29:23.083
It got pretty rough.
00:29:26.168 --> 00:29:30.250
It made me understand
many things about life...
00:29:31.208 --> 00:29:33.418
...how impatient people can get.
00:29:33.918 --> 00:29:37.625
The world has no patience
for the hard-of-hearing.
00:29:38.793 --> 00:29:42.583
-Shall I cut them in half?
-You'll get more sandwiches.
00:29:43.293 --> 00:29:46.583
-I feel observed.
-Yes, I can imagine.
00:29:46.875 --> 00:29:49.625
After three days,
I've gotten used to it.
00:29:50.333 --> 00:29:53.083
-She's a film star by now.
-I'm in my element!
00:29:56.708 --> 00:30:02.168
The thing about hearing loss is...
it becomes your neighbor's problem.
00:30:02.833 --> 00:30:06.000
I started experiencing that
from a young age, see?
00:30:06.500 --> 00:30:08.168
It was a problem for my classmates,
00:30:08.333 --> 00:30:11.083
it was a problem for the teacher.
00:30:12.668 --> 00:30:15.375
Generally speaking,
in my everyday life.
00:30:17.833 --> 00:30:20.958
I also became aware
of my hearing loss rather late.
00:30:21.168 --> 00:30:23.543
I remember that as a little boy...
00:30:24.375 --> 00:30:27.918
I watched cartoons
and remembered all the names.
00:30:28.168 --> 00:30:30.333
Never again was I able to do that...
00:30:30.500 --> 00:30:32.625
...watch dubbed stuff,
00:30:33.043 --> 00:30:35.418
radio, telephones...
00:30:36.168 --> 00:30:37.793
...all that is hard for me.
00:31:03.458 --> 00:31:05.333
There's one thing I discovered
00:31:05.500 --> 00:31:07.458
which merits looking into.
00:31:07.708 --> 00:31:10.250
Is your blood type
positive or negative?
00:31:10.418 --> 00:31:11.418
Negative.
00:31:11.750 --> 00:31:15.125
In this family, everyone with
negative blood type
00:31:15.293 --> 00:31:16.793
suffers from hearing loss.
00:31:17.000 --> 00:31:18.500
I discovered that myself.
00:31:20.458 --> 00:31:21.833
-Arancha?
-Negative.
00:31:22.000 --> 00:31:23.250
-A negative?
-Yes.
00:31:23.418 --> 00:31:24.625
I'm A negative.
00:31:24.958 --> 00:31:26.500
I've never asked the rest.
00:31:26.875 --> 00:31:29.125
-Let's ask them!
-Let's do it.
00:31:30.043 --> 00:31:32.250
-Because I doubt your dad is...
-He is.
00:31:32.418 --> 00:31:35.375
-He is A negative.
-Really? There you go.
00:31:49.500 --> 00:31:50.750
It happens.
00:31:51.083 --> 00:31:56.168
I've become a little insecure
due to being hard-of-hearing.
00:31:56.793 --> 00:32:00.918
You know,
the closest thing to hearing loss
00:32:01.208 --> 00:32:04.793
is being surrounded
by people who speak French.
00:32:05.250 --> 00:32:09.458
You won't understand a thing
because they speak another language.
00:32:09.625 --> 00:32:11.375
It's a similar feeling.
00:32:12.375 --> 00:32:16.083
One thing about this
whole hearing loss thing
00:32:16.250 --> 00:32:19.250
is that you hear
much of your own thoughts.
00:32:20.583 --> 00:32:22.458
You don't get easily distracted.
00:32:23.375 --> 00:32:26.875
You tend to overthink.
00:32:27.583 --> 00:32:31.875
That's why all I do is
from an emotional approach,
00:32:32.418 --> 00:32:37.583
it's a way to vent
all this burden inside me.
00:32:41.625 --> 00:32:45.375
-What's your blood type?
-In decibel levels?
00:32:45.625 --> 00:32:48.708
-No, blood type.
-A negative.
00:32:48.875 --> 00:32:50.543
-See? A negative.
-Yeah.
00:32:50.708 --> 00:32:52.125
They're all A negative.
00:32:52.293 --> 00:32:55.000
Arancha, what's your blood type?
00:32:55.875 --> 00:32:57.500
Tell me your blood type.
00:32:58.208 --> 00:32:59.625
-A negative.
-And you, Martin?
00:33:00.543 --> 00:33:02.625
-What's your blood type?
-He says he doesn't know.
00:33:15.833 --> 00:33:18.625
What was your first audiometry like?
00:33:21.375 --> 00:33:25.083
There was an orca poster...
00:33:25.833 --> 00:33:28.500
...which called my attention.
00:33:28.918 --> 00:33:32.375
My speech therapist explained
to me how whales
00:33:32.918 --> 00:33:38.500
communicate using a frequency
which is inaudible to humans.
00:33:51.375 --> 00:33:53.793
4. The ears of the mind.
00:33:53.958 --> 00:33:57.500
What's being hard-of-hearing like?
00:34:25.668 --> 00:34:27.875
I never told you I love the tub
00:34:28.125 --> 00:34:29.625
because while submerged
00:34:29.793 --> 00:34:32.293
our neighbor's footsteps
sound like a heart beating.
00:34:32.500 --> 00:34:35.375
I can also hear
my heartbeats, and feel them
00:34:35.543 --> 00:34:37.668
even when I no longer hear them.
00:34:43.543 --> 00:34:45.375
It's been a while
00:34:45.543 --> 00:34:48.918
since I started questioning
the true sound of things.
00:34:50.918 --> 00:34:54.958
All of my parameters
are made from memories.
00:35:12.750 --> 00:35:17.543
"Hard-of-hearing" for me
means "deaf for life",
00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:22.793
because it's severe bilateral,
which means I'll be deaf for life.
00:36:17.125 --> 00:36:22.668
I was born with severe
bilateral hearing loss,
00:36:23.208 --> 00:36:24.833
but my parents didn't know.
00:36:25.293 --> 00:36:28.250
When I was 3 months old,
they realized
00:36:28.418 --> 00:36:32.000
I'd connect but couldn't hear.
00:36:32.375 --> 00:36:37.208
So they would drop things
on the floor: books, the cat...
00:36:37.418 --> 00:36:39.833
...I wouldn't respond.
00:36:40.458 --> 00:36:43.543
They immediately took me
to several doctors.
00:36:43.708 --> 00:36:46.125
They all said my mum
was going crazy
00:36:46.293 --> 00:36:48.708
because I'd look at them
and laugh.
00:36:48.918 --> 00:36:51.250
But then a doctor saw me
00:36:51.458 --> 00:36:53.043
and she asked my mum:
00:36:53.208 --> 00:36:55.168
"What do you think?"
00:36:55.333 --> 00:36:57.083
And my mum said
I couldn't hear.
00:36:57.458 --> 00:37:00.208
So they started to run
a bunch of tests
00:37:00.375 --> 00:37:02.458
and realized I couldn't hear.
00:37:05.583 --> 00:37:07.668
When I was 18 months,
I had a surgery
00:37:08.125 --> 00:37:09.958
and they placed my implants.
00:37:32.043 --> 00:37:35.958
Cochlear implants
are electronic devices.
00:37:36.750 --> 00:37:40.833
To date, they are the only
sensory-related devices
00:37:41.000 --> 00:37:44.583
that allow for lost or missing
organs to be reactivated.
00:37:46.043 --> 00:37:48.250
There's an internal unit,
00:37:48.958 --> 00:37:51.418
which is implanted under the skin.
00:37:51.668 --> 00:37:55.668
Along with it,
there's an outside component
00:37:56.000 --> 00:37:57.958
which is placed on the skin;
00:37:58.250 --> 00:38:00.625
the sound processor.
00:38:05.958 --> 00:38:09.708
Tell me what you remember
about seeing a speech therapist
00:38:09.875 --> 00:38:11.500
and why you stopped going.
00:38:11.833 --> 00:38:15.250
I stopped going
because I can speak well now.
00:38:15.418 --> 00:38:18.293
I started going
because I didn't know how to speak.
00:38:18.625 --> 00:38:21.043
I only learned at age 3.
00:38:21.418 --> 00:38:23.833
That's why I needed
a speech therapist.
00:38:24.083 --> 00:38:25.833
How long did you see her?
00:38:26.000 --> 00:38:29.293
You started after being implanted
and stopped at what age?
00:38:30.208 --> 00:38:33.708
Until I was seven, I guess.
00:38:42.250 --> 00:38:45.083
Children with moderate to severe
hearing loss
00:38:45.250 --> 00:38:47.083
can hear with hearing aids.
00:38:48.125 --> 00:38:51.293
That's not the case
for profound hearing loss.
00:38:51.625 --> 00:38:55.168
Children with profound hearing loss
need cochlear implants.
00:38:55.833 --> 00:38:59.125
For a deaf child,
having a cochlear implant
00:38:59.293 --> 00:39:01.125
means discovering sound.
00:39:01.333 --> 00:39:03.958
But, being so young
it feels natural to them
00:39:04.500 --> 00:39:08.083
that they embrace sound very fast.
00:39:08.418 --> 00:39:13.333
It's a whole different story
if you get implanted later in life.
00:39:13.583 --> 00:39:17.125
Rest the elbows firmly.
00:39:18.043 --> 00:39:22.000
Slide your chest and stomach
onto the board.
00:39:47.375 --> 00:39:52.543
Rest your stomach on the board.
Raise your shoulders.
00:39:53.458 --> 00:39:56.875
Kick inside the water.
00:39:58.208 --> 00:39:59.918
Do you enjoy silence?
00:40:00.083 --> 00:40:02.000
What's it like
when you remove your implants?
00:40:02.083 --> 00:40:05.708
It's quiet. Sometimes
there's a lot of shouting at home.
00:40:05.875 --> 00:40:09.708
Plus, my dog barks,
and fights with my cats.
00:40:09.875 --> 00:40:12.543
So, a little silence is like...
00:40:12.958 --> 00:40:14.293
...so peaceful.
00:40:16.625 --> 00:40:18.250
Especially if I'm asleep.
00:40:18.625 --> 00:40:21.833
Because I can dream profoundly.
00:40:50.500 --> 00:40:55.333
When you remove your implants,
is the silence scary?
00:40:56.333 --> 00:40:59.543
No. I love it.
I do. Nothing scary about it.
00:40:59.875 --> 00:41:01.168
Feels strange, though.
00:41:01.333 --> 00:41:04.708
It's as if everyone's gone mute
without the implants.
00:41:04.875 --> 00:41:06.125
It feels strange.
00:41:06.793 --> 00:41:08.918
-What does it sound like?
-It's like...
00:41:10.668 --> 00:41:12.708
Everything goes silent.
00:41:12.958 --> 00:41:18.875
As if you stayed away from home
for more than a month,
00:41:19.043 --> 00:41:21.875
everything is quiet.
No one's there.
00:41:22.208 --> 00:41:23.625
It's like that.
00:41:36.583 --> 00:41:38.000
-Hi.
-Hi.
00:41:40.333 --> 00:41:42.958
What do you remember
about our first few sessions?
00:41:43.125 --> 00:41:45.043
What did I need first?
00:41:45.293 --> 00:41:47.168
When we met,
you were very young.
00:41:47.500 --> 00:41:50.458
You had only one hearing aid.
00:41:51.293 --> 00:41:54.750
Back then, we only had
a few sessions together.
00:41:55.668 --> 00:41:59.168
Since you were not
certified as disabled...
00:41:59.583 --> 00:42:02.000
your treatment was interrupted.
00:42:02.208 --> 00:42:06.833
It was a private treatment
and your parents couldn't afford it.
00:42:08.958 --> 00:42:13.208
It wasn't enough
because your hearing was unilateral.
00:42:13.543 --> 00:42:16.208
You should have had
two hearing aids.
00:42:18.000 --> 00:42:19.543
-Three.
-Three.
00:42:19.833 --> 00:42:21.250
-Free.
-Free.
00:42:21.458 --> 00:42:23.250
-There.
-Fair.
00:42:23.418 --> 00:42:25.043
-Bear.
-Bear.
00:42:25.208 --> 00:42:27.043
-See
-See.
00:42:27.208 --> 00:42:28.708
-Be.
-Be.
00:42:29.043 --> 00:42:31.083
-Judge.
-Smudge.
00:42:31.250 --> 00:42:33.543
-Thin.
-Tin.
00:42:34.043 --> 00:42:36.043
-Light.
-Light.
00:42:37.833 --> 00:42:40.125
Have you ever been bullied?
00:42:41.000 --> 00:42:45.043
In 3rd grade, some kids
started calling me "deaf",
00:42:45.208 --> 00:42:48.500
but, instead of crying,
I stood up for myself.
00:42:48.668 --> 00:42:52.625
I told them, "I'm not deaf,
I'm hard-of-hearing."
00:42:53.000 --> 00:42:56.083
I didn't know it meant the same.
00:42:56.250 --> 00:42:59.500
That's why I said it.
And I told my teacher too.
00:42:59.918 --> 00:43:01.293
And what did they say?
00:43:03.833 --> 00:43:07.125
They sort of walked away...
00:43:27.543 --> 00:43:31.458
I hated you asking the teacher
if she was sitting me at the front.
00:43:32.543 --> 00:43:33.708
I hated it.
00:43:33.875 --> 00:43:35.625
I felt watched.
00:43:38.250 --> 00:43:42.043
I couldn't hear anyone,
their lips were behind me.
00:43:45.875 --> 00:43:50.333
Sometimes I would turn
and read my classmates' lips
00:43:51.000 --> 00:43:52.668
badmouthing me.
00:43:55.668 --> 00:43:58.208
Eventually they realized
what I could do,
00:43:58.375 --> 00:44:02.583
so they started covering
their mouths with their hands.
00:44:04.000 --> 00:44:05.625
I was good at pretending.
00:44:06.208 --> 00:44:08.125
But I couldn't figure them out,
00:44:08.333 --> 00:44:10.250
so I isolated myself and read.
00:44:11.083 --> 00:44:12.543
Hearing loss made me different
00:44:12.708 --> 00:44:14.543
yet no one dared to notice.
00:44:21.208 --> 00:44:23.625
5. What if I stop hearing
altogether?
00:44:23.958 --> 00:44:26.625
I need a miracle.
00:44:35.458 --> 00:44:37.333
Autumn of 2003.
00:44:37.958 --> 00:44:40.668
We didn't still have cellphones.
00:44:43.208 --> 00:44:45.458
A strong storm shook the city.
00:44:48.168 --> 00:44:51.958
You were teaching a class
and no one could reach you.
00:44:54.333 --> 00:44:57.000
I got off the bus
with Sofi to go to school.
00:44:57.625 --> 00:44:59.750
Dad was leaving the country.
00:45:02.250 --> 00:45:04.000
I feared it would get wet,
00:45:04.458 --> 00:45:08.168
but it slipped from my hand
and fell very deep.
00:45:11.750 --> 00:45:13.793
I lost my hearing aid.
00:45:20.875 --> 00:45:24.625
You were always,
and that's your mother's training...
00:45:25.043 --> 00:45:28.293
...both your sister and you,
you were always very careful.
00:45:28.543 --> 00:45:32.918
You valued objects more
than the average kid.
00:45:33.250 --> 00:45:37.418
You were really careful
with your hearing aid.
00:45:38.458 --> 00:45:41.668
It was raining, so you took it off.
00:45:41.875 --> 00:45:43.625
You got off the bus...
00:45:45.750 --> 00:45:46.875
...and you dropped it.
00:45:56.458 --> 00:46:00.125
It was a day like any other,
we started the school activities
00:46:00.293 --> 00:46:04.418
with the usual excitement
of the youngest ones.
00:46:04.918 --> 00:46:10.458
Then you and your sister arrived.
You were really upset, crying,
00:46:10.625 --> 00:46:12.668
and told us you'd lost
your hearing aid
00:46:12.833 --> 00:46:14.375
while crossing Corrientes street.
00:46:14.543 --> 00:46:17.875
You took it off due to the rain,
if I'm not mistaken,
00:46:19.168 --> 00:46:22.208
and you were desperate
because it was really expensive.
00:46:22.375 --> 00:46:26.833
And you didn't have insurance,
and thought you'd never get it back.
00:46:31.125 --> 00:46:34.000
You freaked out
and started to cry
00:46:34.168 --> 00:46:36.168
very nervous and distressed.
00:46:36.333 --> 00:46:39.375
We talked to Mabel, I think.
00:46:39.543 --> 00:46:42.250
And they called Civil Defense.
00:46:47.418 --> 00:46:49.208
The manhole cover was removed.
00:46:49.750 --> 00:46:52.083
They told you not to get
your hopes up,
00:46:52.250 --> 00:46:55.583
as they didn't think
they'd be able to retrieve it.
00:46:57.458 --> 00:46:59.333
I wondered how would
hear from then on
00:46:59.500 --> 00:47:01.750
or how would I tell you
I had lost it.
00:47:13.833 --> 00:47:16.250
And I remember you,
in all your distress,
00:47:16.418 --> 00:47:20.543
sitting by those
green couches over there,
00:47:20.918 --> 00:47:23.543
staring at
Mother Euphrasia's picture,
00:47:23.708 --> 00:47:27.793
I know, because you told me so,
that you prayed to her.
00:47:28.418 --> 00:47:29.793
You asked her
to help you get it back.
00:47:33.500 --> 00:47:37.583
I did as I was told
and prayed to Mother Euphrasia.
00:47:53.293 --> 00:47:55.293
So...
00:47:55.708 --> 00:47:59.125
...yes, I remember, for a change.
00:47:59.293 --> 00:48:00.833
I remember the guy
00:48:01.000 --> 00:48:05.043
coming out from that well
with your hearing aid,
00:48:05.833 --> 00:48:08.543
but he looked
as if he'd recovered
00:48:08.708 --> 00:48:12.418
the diamond from
King Solomon's caves.
00:48:13.293 --> 00:48:15.208
He said: "This is a miracle...
00:48:15.625 --> 00:48:18.375
...it fell on a dust mound,
00:48:18.543 --> 00:48:21.083
I wonder how
it wasn't washed away!".
00:48:22.708 --> 00:48:25.958
It was a proper miracle.
00:48:38.333 --> 00:48:39.708
Chari.
00:48:41.250 --> 00:48:42.293
Chari!
00:48:52.875 --> 00:48:54.918
Hold still! Halt it!
00:48:56.168 --> 00:48:57.333
-You idiot.
-What?
00:48:57.500 --> 00:49:00.875
Stay still for a second.
I'm making a video.
00:49:01.708 --> 00:49:03.293
It's fine, go ahead.
00:49:05.833 --> 00:49:09.168
He says "communicative attitude"
and then he shushes me.
00:49:09.750 --> 00:49:12.875
You deserve it.
You never listen to what others say.
00:49:13.043 --> 00:49:16.293
Point the camera at me, Sofia.
I have a confession to make.
00:49:16.668 --> 00:49:19.043
You complain about
my communicative attitude,
00:49:19.208 --> 00:49:22.333
yet Dad shushes me
when I ask him something.
00:49:23.125 --> 00:49:25.043
As I grew up,
the loss increased.
00:49:25.208 --> 00:49:26.668
Hello, hello.
00:49:28.875 --> 00:49:30.043
Don't film all the time.
00:49:30.625 --> 00:49:32.250
I don't.
00:49:33.625 --> 00:49:34.668
What's up?
00:49:50.833 --> 00:49:54.458
I remember when I told you
I could no longer follow my classes.
00:49:54.793 --> 00:49:56.043
I couldn't keep up.
00:49:56.208 --> 00:49:58.000
You had started studying
to get your degree
00:49:58.168 --> 00:50:00.458
for teaching
differently abled and deaf children.
00:50:01.625 --> 00:50:04.333
You heard about
the disability certification
00:50:04.500 --> 00:50:06.708
to buy me two hearing aids.
00:50:07.250 --> 00:50:09.708
Yet you were terrified
of me feeling weak
00:50:09.875 --> 00:50:14.125
on account of being labeled
a disabled person.
00:50:15.500 --> 00:50:19.293
When you came back at the age 16,
you couldn't understand a thing.
00:50:19.625 --> 00:50:23.793
When I covered my mouth,
language was beyond you.
00:50:24.168 --> 00:50:29.793
You had got used,
throughout your childhood,
00:50:30.000 --> 00:50:33.293
to reading lips.
You heard things, too.
00:50:33.625 --> 00:50:36.083
You had auditory capabilities,
00:50:36.250 --> 00:50:40.000
but couldn't make things
intelligible just by hearing them.
00:50:40.208 --> 00:50:41.458
You needed to look.
00:50:41.793 --> 00:50:44.418
Everyone's drunk but you and me.
00:50:44.583 --> 00:50:46.250
The rest...all wasted.
00:50:48.458 --> 00:50:49.833
-Don't you think?
-What?
00:50:50.000 --> 00:50:52.833
-Do you agree?
-Yeah!
00:50:53.668 --> 00:50:55.000
Bunch of drunks.
00:50:55.168 --> 00:50:56.958
-But not us.
-What?
00:50:57.125 --> 00:50:59.168
-Not us.
-Who?
00:50:59.333 --> 00:51:01.500
Leave us out of it.
00:51:01.708 --> 00:51:03.793
Right, we're off the hook.
00:51:24.793 --> 00:51:27.293
My friends understood
when I retreated.
00:51:27.583 --> 00:51:29.793
Anything was better
than going around the yard
00:51:29.958 --> 00:51:31.708
trying to listen to what they said
00:51:31.875 --> 00:51:33.333
amid all the screaming.
00:51:35.333 --> 00:51:37.293
I grew to hate recesses.
00:51:59.793 --> 00:52:02.250
You were preparing
for me going completely deaf
00:52:02.418 --> 00:52:03.958
by studying sign language.
00:52:05.083 --> 00:52:07.043
I felt an increasing urge to hear,
00:52:07.583 --> 00:52:09.875
and started to disregard
what others thought
00:52:10.043 --> 00:52:11.500
about my looks or who I was.
00:52:12.750 --> 00:52:14.833
What mattered was how I felt.
00:52:17.833 --> 00:52:21.708
We hoped rehabilitation
would help me continue studying.
00:52:23.043 --> 00:52:26.250
So we obtained
my first disability certification,
00:52:26.543 --> 00:52:29.418
and got my first hearing aid
with frequency modulation,
00:52:36.125 --> 00:52:38.083
There's a group of people,
00:52:38.250 --> 00:52:42.208
that you can find
at special schools for the deaf,
00:52:42.625 --> 00:52:46.583
who advocate sign language
00:52:46.833 --> 00:52:50.083
and for the deaf to be
a separate community.
00:52:50.833 --> 00:52:54.500
If you're deaf,
that's your whole identity.
00:52:54.668 --> 00:52:56.875
Likewise if you're a hearing person.
00:52:57.043 --> 00:53:02.750
Receiving treatment would
compromise your identity.
00:53:03.043 --> 00:53:06.918
A large group of people who worked
at the school where Mum studied
00:53:07.083 --> 00:53:10.750
who thought that way.
They disapproved of implants.
00:53:11.833 --> 00:53:14.750
6. The invisible.
00:53:15.000 --> 00:53:18.333
What are silences like?
00:53:20.625 --> 00:53:23.000
Sofi, how does hearing work for you?
00:53:23.458 --> 00:53:24.833
Through an implant.
00:53:26.000 --> 00:53:27.625
Without it, you hear nothing.
00:53:27.793 --> 00:53:28.750
Exactly.
00:53:29.000 --> 00:53:31.333
What's silence like for you?
00:53:31.500 --> 00:53:32.583
Nice.
00:53:33.333 --> 00:53:34.043
Nice?
00:53:34.458 --> 00:53:36.208
Move your body.
00:53:38.000 --> 00:53:40.000
Move your head.
00:53:40.168 --> 00:53:44.458
To one side...
and then to the other.
00:53:46.543 --> 00:53:51.000
If you need to, open your mouth
to release the stress in your neck.
00:53:51.833 --> 00:53:54.833
Exactly. I get to the point,
which may be far...
00:53:55.333 --> 00:53:57.833
What do you think
acting in a film is like?
00:53:58.668 --> 00:54:03.168
What do you expect and why
would you let me tell your story?
00:54:05.333 --> 00:54:08.375
I don't know.
Maybe I could help others.
00:54:09.250 --> 00:54:12.750
Maybe the next thing I'll say
has nothing to do,
00:54:12.958 --> 00:54:16.793
but I have very low self-esteem.
00:54:18.543 --> 00:54:21.418
And it's very hard for me
to embrace my deafness.
00:54:21.583 --> 00:54:23.875
I don't share it with anyone.
00:54:24.043 --> 00:54:27.043
No one whatsoever.
Only those close to me
00:54:27.208 --> 00:54:29.543
and my family, but no one else.
00:54:29.750 --> 00:54:31.833
It's too difficult for me.
00:54:32.000 --> 00:54:36.293
I can't wear a ponytail
or let my device be seen in any way.
00:54:37.458 --> 00:54:39.833
Would you show it to me?
00:54:40.458 --> 00:54:41.833
-Yes.
-Would you?
00:54:42.043 --> 00:54:43.083
Show me.
00:54:45.875 --> 00:54:48.333
Those earrings look great on you!
00:54:51.043 --> 00:54:53.833
It's so difficult for me...
00:54:54.000 --> 00:54:55.250
-Is it?
-Yeah.
00:54:55.543 --> 00:54:59.043
Close your eyes.
Breathe...
00:54:59.500 --> 00:55:04.043
My parents realized
when I was 18 months old...
00:55:04.708 --> 00:55:08.293
I wasn't developing.
I didn't talk, nothing.
00:55:08.668 --> 00:55:12.583
I yelled, and this
made my father suspicious.
00:55:12.875 --> 00:55:15.375
He picked me up at kindergarten.
00:55:15.875 --> 00:55:18.708
The other kids left
with their parents
00:55:18.875 --> 00:55:20.875
but I'd stay back, very still.
00:55:21.043 --> 00:55:22.333
So...
00:55:23.708 --> 00:55:26.833
He thought that was strange
and he told my mother.
00:55:27.083 --> 00:55:30.418
She screamed into my ear
and realized I was deaf.
00:55:38.375 --> 00:55:39.668
-Chari...
-What?
00:55:39.833 --> 00:55:43.083
They're asking you if you'll study
Image and Sound Design?
00:55:43.375 --> 00:55:44.375
I will.
00:55:44.543 --> 00:55:45.583
I'll turn it off.
00:55:47.750 --> 00:55:50.543
No more going out at night.
00:55:51.418 --> 00:55:55.333
-No more what?
-Going out at night.
00:56:05.833 --> 00:56:08.875
Although my rehabilitation
wasn't going very well,
00:56:09.293 --> 00:56:12.500
I believed I'd be able
to attend a state university.
00:56:14.793 --> 00:56:17.833
So I did what I'd been
advised against.
00:56:19.333 --> 00:56:22.543
I studied Image and Sound Design.
00:56:37.583 --> 00:56:39.083
-Hi, teach.
-Hi.
00:56:39.375 --> 00:56:44.918
My name's Sofia.
I have hearing problems.
00:56:45.083 --> 00:56:47.418
-I need you to wear this.
-Sure.
00:56:47.583 --> 00:56:48.708
-So I can hear you.
-Alright.
00:56:48.875 --> 00:56:49.750
Thanks.
00:57:22.543 --> 00:57:24.208
The mic, please.
00:57:27.375 --> 00:57:28.918
-Sorry.
-Thanks.
00:57:31.250 --> 00:57:34.875
Let's start with the basics.
00:57:35.043 --> 00:57:37.250
First, let's define sound.
00:57:37.418 --> 00:57:42.918
Sound is a mechanical wave.
In other words, a vibration.
00:57:43.208 --> 00:57:49.375
It's energy that can be plotted
as a sine wave, for example.
00:57:49.750 --> 00:57:52.708
There's also
the issue of loudness, OK?
00:57:52.875 --> 00:57:57.083
It's the effect taking place
in your eardrum
00:57:57.250 --> 00:58:00.625
caused by colliding molecules
00:58:00.958 --> 00:58:03.043
which have propagated
due to energy
00:58:03.208 --> 00:58:05.793
being applied
to them at a certain point.
00:58:26.293 --> 00:58:31.500
Remember how happy we were
picking up my second hearing aid?
00:58:32.125 --> 00:58:34.500
Back from spending
holidays with Dad,
00:58:34.668 --> 00:58:37.000
I was to resume my rehabilitation.
00:58:37.668 --> 00:58:40.083
That first night back,
after landing,
00:58:41.168 --> 00:58:44.750
a sharp sound in my left year
woke me up.
00:58:45.293 --> 00:58:49.625
Together, we started looking
for the source of the sound.
00:58:53.708 --> 00:58:56.083
We thought
the toilet tap was open.
00:58:57.333 --> 00:58:58.750
It wasn't.
00:58:59.375 --> 00:59:01.333
And yet I kept hearing it.
00:59:01.918 --> 00:59:04.543
We realized the sound was inside me.
00:59:09.333 --> 00:59:12.418
I had never experienced
such strange tinnitus.
00:59:12.583 --> 00:59:15.708
An endless rattling sound.
00:59:27.333 --> 00:59:29.083
I started having trouble sleeping.
00:59:29.418 --> 00:59:30.833
I heard nothing outside
00:59:31.000 --> 00:59:34.458
while a sharp spring
sounded inside me.
00:59:37.750 --> 00:59:41.500
Unwittingly, I had lost
all the hearing in my left ear.
00:59:42.293 --> 00:59:45.293
I didn't hear
what I thought I was hearing.
00:59:51.293 --> 00:59:55.458
We were told a cochlear implant
was the solution but you refused.
00:59:57.500 --> 01:00:01.000
I started the application process
myself and you got mad.
01:00:01.168 --> 01:00:03.458
You felt I was ignoring
or disregarding you.
01:00:07.083 --> 01:00:10.208
You didn't want a microchip
inserted in my brain.
01:00:11.000 --> 01:00:13.333
I told you a thousand times
I had nothing to lose.
01:00:15.833 --> 01:00:19.543
But the doctors said
I needed approval from both parents.
01:00:25.293 --> 01:00:28.043
I was scared of starting
to prefer silence...
01:00:28.333 --> 01:00:30.793
having to read lips all the time...
01:00:33.918 --> 01:00:36.625
and, naturally,
talking too much to myself.
01:00:44.833 --> 01:00:48.375
Silence is a quiet place,
01:00:49.168 --> 01:00:51.293
but also a mysterious one.
01:00:53.958 --> 01:00:56.458
7. A Cochlear Implant?
01:00:56.625 --> 01:00:59.543
The metamorphosis
01:01:01.833 --> 01:01:04.793
Was it difficult for them
to have you implanted in Uruguay?
01:01:04.958 --> 01:01:05.875
Do you know?
01:01:06.918 --> 01:01:08.833
Sort of. Maybe.
01:01:09.293 --> 01:01:11.418
I don't know. I'm not sure...
01:01:11.583 --> 01:01:14.750
I know many told them
that it was dangerous
01:01:14.918 --> 01:01:17.543
and advised them
against the surgery.
01:01:18.043 --> 01:01:24.875
They tried to manipulate my mother
so I wouldn't have surgery
01:01:25.043 --> 01:01:27.168
and study sign language instead.
01:01:27.918 --> 01:01:29.833
My mother didn't go along with it.
01:01:30.000 --> 01:01:34.625
A neighbor who works
with deaf people, or used to,
01:01:35.125 --> 01:01:38.708
advised my mother
not to let them sway her
01:01:38.875 --> 01:01:40.793
and make her own decision.
01:01:41.043 --> 01:01:44.043
She thought about it
and I had surgery.
01:01:54.918 --> 01:01:59.458
I think the taboo about surgery
started at your teaching courses.
01:01:59.625 --> 01:02:02.083
No natural hearing would remain.
01:02:02.793 --> 01:02:03.958
But what is natural?
01:02:05.125 --> 01:02:06.918
Is, by chance, change natural?
01:02:24.125 --> 01:02:26.543
Loneliness became an ally.
01:02:27.918 --> 01:02:31.083
Feeling lost was becoming
something natural.
01:02:31.168 --> 01:02:34.375
Only the loud sound
of a siren would wake me up.
01:02:35.750 --> 01:02:38.125
We stopped talking over the phone
01:02:38.293 --> 01:02:40.168
and narrowed it all to SMS.
01:02:46.250 --> 01:02:50.543
I think Dad, Mum and myself,
01:02:50.708 --> 01:02:53.458
all of us are fearful.
01:02:55.083 --> 01:02:58.833
We are not optimistic
carefree people.
01:02:59.125 --> 01:03:01.168
Everything frightens us.
01:03:06.583 --> 01:03:09.125
We need to erode this bone...
01:03:10.543 --> 01:03:14.708
to gain access to the middle ear.
01:03:17.583 --> 01:03:20.168
Why didn't Mum and you want me
have the surgery?
01:03:20.333 --> 01:03:21.583
What were you afraid of?
01:03:21.875 --> 01:03:23.458
Everything.
01:03:24.125 --> 01:03:27.083
First thing that crossed my mind was
01:03:27.250 --> 01:03:29.750
"she having surgery
without being sick".
01:03:32.293 --> 01:03:36.333
And I was terrified for your brain.
01:03:37.293 --> 01:03:41.168
You know? The hole they were
going to drill in your skull.
01:03:41.833 --> 01:03:45.375
They would be around your brain.
01:03:45.918 --> 01:03:50.418
That was the part that...
01:03:50.583 --> 01:03:54.125
...we all know how delicate
that area is.
01:03:54.293 --> 01:03:59.125
That was mainly the whole point.
01:03:59.458 --> 01:04:03.043
The fact that they'd be
working inside your head.
01:04:21.958 --> 01:04:24.500
I know you were terrified
but I couldn't just accept
01:04:24.668 --> 01:04:26.250
the idea of never hearing again.
01:04:41.168 --> 01:04:44.875
This is an authentic
wonder, Argentine prawns.
01:04:46.500 --> 01:04:50.418
They are native and really good.
01:04:55.875 --> 01:04:57.668
When you spoke of an implant
01:04:57.833 --> 01:05:01.083
and surgeons putting something
inside your head,
01:05:02.083 --> 01:05:06.750
I thought that would mean
never getting into the ocean again.
01:05:12.375 --> 01:05:15.418
You'd have to choose
between hearing or the ocean.
01:05:15.583 --> 01:05:17.750
And I found that terrible.
01:05:22.793 --> 01:05:25.043
I must admit I wasn't aware
01:05:25.208 --> 01:05:27.958
how serious
Charo's hearing loss got,
01:05:28.125 --> 01:05:31.000
You sort of get used to it.
01:05:31.333 --> 01:05:34.458
Anyway, before the surgery,
01:05:34.625 --> 01:05:38.458
Charo and I could hardly
have a phone conversation.
01:05:42.708 --> 01:05:45.583
It wasn't just about
our communication
01:05:45.750 --> 01:05:48.083
but also her self-development.
01:05:48.250 --> 01:05:50.500
Hey, Dad, I'm here! Talk to me.
01:05:54.125 --> 01:05:57.293
Mum and Dad were scared to death.
01:05:57.500 --> 01:06:01.250
They didn't want you implanted
and instilled fear in you.
01:06:01.418 --> 01:06:03.168
Fear of the surgery going wrong.
01:06:03.543 --> 01:06:06.875
Honestly, in your place,
under all that pressure, I mean...
01:06:09.250 --> 01:06:11.125
We proceed...
01:06:12.125 --> 01:06:13.918
...very slowly...
01:06:16.125 --> 01:06:18.125
...inserting the electrode.
01:06:24.875 --> 01:06:26.875
Very slowly...
01:06:28.125 --> 01:06:33.293
...as we count: seven, eight,
01:06:34.208 --> 01:06:37.208
nine, ten,
01:06:38.168 --> 01:06:41.000
eleven, twelve,
01:06:41.793 --> 01:06:44.458
thirteen, fourteen,
01:06:45.708 --> 01:06:47.333
fifteen, sixteen...
01:06:47.793 --> 01:06:51.793
If everything goes well,
we suture the muscle
01:06:52.293 --> 01:06:54.583
and then the skin.
01:06:55.958 --> 01:06:59.293
We bandage the area
using a compressive bandage,
01:06:59.458 --> 01:07:01.293
and end the surgery.
01:07:05.458 --> 01:07:10.458
There you have it,
three of each.
01:07:10.625 --> 01:07:12.458
One more.
01:07:15.043 --> 01:07:19.583
These prawns are outstanding.
01:07:20.708 --> 01:07:24.708
What do you think
about acoustic memory?
01:07:24.875 --> 01:07:26.750
I learned that term from you.
01:07:27.250 --> 01:07:29.125
Once I got it, it was like wow!
01:07:29.500 --> 01:07:31.668
I wonder if it happens
to the blind.
01:07:33.500 --> 01:07:36.708
But it was really shocking.
01:07:38.875 --> 01:07:44.458
When you told me...
I put myself in your shoes.
01:07:44.625 --> 01:07:49.125
Like: "I'm the one who is deaf.
and can't hear a thing."
01:07:49.750 --> 01:07:52.208
I realized...
01:07:53.833 --> 01:07:56.043
...you could start forgetting...
01:07:57.250 --> 01:07:59.668
...what sounds sounded like.
01:07:59.833 --> 01:08:02.958
You know? As something
that started to fade away.
01:08:07.293 --> 01:08:11.168
We once talked about that footage...
01:08:12.918 --> 01:08:14.543
...of the sea...
01:08:15.043 --> 01:08:18.293
washing away the drawings
we had made in the sand.
01:08:22.043 --> 01:08:24.668
Up to that point,
it had been a difficulty.
01:08:24.833 --> 01:08:26.625
But forgetting them?
01:08:28.250 --> 01:08:30.918
It was a point of no return.
01:08:31.793 --> 01:08:34.625
It stroke me...really deep,
01:08:34.793 --> 01:08:37.875
because that's what
acoustic memory is all about.
01:08:38.250 --> 01:08:41.875
The vibrations you hear
through your ears
01:08:42.083 --> 01:08:47.083
are vibrations that your brain
matches with counterparts
01:08:47.333 --> 01:08:49.250
in your mind.
01:08:50.625 --> 01:08:53.083
And if it doesn't find anything...
01:08:53.418 --> 01:08:55.043
...there's no way out.
01:09:02.458 --> 01:09:04.958
I thought, "We're in deep shit."
01:09:05.125 --> 01:09:06.375
Not being able to hear
is one thing,
01:09:06.543 --> 01:09:08.250
but forgetting how to do it
is something else.
01:09:11.250 --> 01:09:13.250
I went ahead with the surgery.
01:09:13.500 --> 01:09:16.208
That's when, although I failed
to persuade you,
01:09:16.375 --> 01:09:18.793
you started supporting me.
01:09:19.208 --> 01:09:21.668
When the psychologist
asked about my family,
01:09:21.918 --> 01:09:24.168
I said they wanted
what was best for me.
01:09:24.918 --> 01:09:27.293
I never said you disapproved of it.
01:09:27.583 --> 01:09:30.000
Hi! How are you?
01:09:47.708 --> 01:09:48.750
A cyborg...
01:09:50.543 --> 01:09:53.458
...that's the right
pronunciation, isn't it?
01:09:53.750 --> 01:09:55.250
-Is it?
-Yeah.
01:09:55.918 --> 01:09:58.293
-Shall we say it that way?
-Shift the stress.
01:09:58.458 --> 01:09:59.625
Cyborg.
01:10:00.418 --> 01:10:01.793
Your stomach's groaning.
01:10:01.958 --> 01:10:04.918
-It is groaning.
-That's what I was hearing.
01:10:05.083 --> 01:10:06.458
-Thought it was mine.
-I hear several.
01:10:06.625 --> 01:10:07.375
Mine's also groaning.
01:10:08.043 --> 01:10:10.458
8. Being a Cyborg
01:10:10.918 --> 01:10:13.793
How does a hearing-impaired hear?
01:10:27.543 --> 01:10:29.333
Charo, are you receiving
this message?
01:10:29.500 --> 01:10:31.375
Can we use this to talk?
01:10:37.958 --> 01:10:40.418
I can't imagine losing all hearing.
01:10:40.958 --> 01:10:43.750
But neither can I imagine
going through another post-op
01:10:43.918 --> 01:10:45.000
without your care.
01:10:45.418 --> 01:10:47.833
You disinfecting
the floors twice a day.
01:10:49.750 --> 01:10:54.125
You were there when I blew my nose
and the pain was excruciating.
01:10:55.375 --> 01:10:59.000
We thought I had dislodged
the electrodes of my cochlea.
01:11:03.875 --> 01:11:05.668
But, once again, I healed,
01:11:05.833 --> 01:11:08.375
and together we went
to have me turned on.
01:11:11.918 --> 01:11:14.918
A sudden, persistent,
annoying noise filled my head.
01:11:16.293 --> 01:11:18.250
A sound of rain in the background.
01:11:20.293 --> 01:11:22.750
It kept raining
for two or three months.
01:11:23.668 --> 01:11:25.625
Gradually, it all cleared up.
01:11:53.793 --> 01:11:56.458
Would you rather
not suffer from hearing loss?
01:11:58.125 --> 01:11:59.333
I would.
01:12:00.458 --> 01:12:03.000
-And hear everything?
-I'd like to.
01:12:03.293 --> 01:12:08.500
But I'm also thankful
for having hearing loss.
01:12:08.668 --> 01:12:13.418
If I'd been born with hearing,
I'd have had a different life.
01:12:17.668 --> 01:12:21.793
I'm thankful to my condition, too.
01:12:21.958 --> 01:12:24.833
My condition made me...
01:12:27.333 --> 01:12:30.583
...fall in love with
symbolic language,
01:12:30.750 --> 01:12:35.958
for all things said
without using words.
01:12:36.708 --> 01:12:39.418
But it's taken its toll
on my social life.
01:12:41.625 --> 01:12:45.500
I mean, I'm extremely sociable...
01:12:46.168 --> 01:12:49.125
...I don't hide in a cave
away from the world.
01:12:49.293 --> 01:12:52.875
But I wish I were more of a talker
01:12:53.043 --> 01:12:55.250
and listen to everyone, above all.
01:13:08.083 --> 01:13:10.543
In between calibrations,
I travelled.
01:13:11.208 --> 01:13:15.043
I went to other places
less noisy than Buenos Aires.
01:13:16.625 --> 01:13:18.250
I put my implant on every day.
01:13:18.418 --> 01:13:19.875
I looked after it.
01:13:20.583 --> 01:13:23.958
I heard sounds
I had never heard before.
01:13:55.458 --> 01:13:59.000
Sometimes, you must take risks.
01:13:59.168 --> 01:14:02.375
In spite of everything.
01:14:03.043 --> 01:14:04.168
-Let's roll.
-Sound?
01:14:05.043 --> 01:14:06.083
It's on.
01:14:06.250 --> 01:14:08.125
I'll put this
very close to your face.
01:14:08.293 --> 01:14:09.293
OK.
01:14:10.583 --> 01:14:11.418
One second.
01:14:11.708 --> 01:14:13.250
Would you like to hear differently?
01:14:14.918 --> 01:14:16.000
I wouldn't.
01:14:17.708 --> 01:14:18.750
And I would.
01:14:20.958 --> 01:14:22.543
That's a great question.
01:14:22.708 --> 01:14:25.750
If I did, would I be able
to do all I do?
01:14:27.083 --> 01:14:29.958
What if everything I do
comes from my condition?
01:14:31.250 --> 01:14:37.083
You mean that being hard-of-hearing
has shaped your personality?
01:14:37.668 --> 01:14:38.708
Definitely.
01:14:48.708 --> 01:14:50.000
As months went by,
01:14:50.333 --> 01:14:54.500
I realized that hearing aids
allowed me just to hear partially.
01:15:01.958 --> 01:15:03.875
There were gaps in the words.
01:15:05.043 --> 01:15:08.250
The implant helped me
give a sound to those gaps.
01:15:08.708 --> 01:15:10.625
It fleshes out sounds.
01:15:15.125 --> 01:15:17.083
I hear people talking
to me from behind,
01:15:17.250 --> 01:15:18.208
and the phone.
01:15:18.500 --> 01:15:20.750
I hear myself like never before.
01:15:23.793 --> 01:15:28.918
It's the most amazing
ear-related invention
01:15:29.333 --> 01:15:32.168
of the 20th and 21st century.
01:15:32.918 --> 01:15:34.458
It has a wide range of benefits.
01:15:34.750 --> 01:15:38.333
That's why I can talk to you
one meter away
01:15:38.793 --> 01:15:42.750
in a normal conversation voice,
which is about 60 dB.
01:15:42.918 --> 01:15:45.293
And I can't tell
you're hard of hearing.
01:15:46.918 --> 01:15:48.875
Food's ready!
01:15:51.543 --> 01:15:53.168
What do you think, Carlitos?
01:15:53.458 --> 01:15:54.708
It looks good...
01:15:54.875 --> 01:15:56.000
...great!
01:15:56.375 --> 01:15:59.083
What happens if I turn off
my implant and my hearing aid?
01:16:00.083 --> 01:16:01.418
You disappear.
01:16:02.958 --> 01:16:05.500
You have that gift.
01:16:06.208 --> 01:16:11.875
It enables you to isolate
yourself from the outside world
01:16:12.083 --> 01:16:13.668
inside your inner world.
01:16:17.375 --> 01:16:19.168
It's a double-edged sword.
01:16:24.043 --> 01:16:26.208
Yet I yearn for silence.
01:16:27.333 --> 01:16:29.750
And I can always
turn my hearing off.
01:16:32.500 --> 01:16:35.583
Cities become magical
when they're silent.
01:16:44.208 --> 01:16:47.125
I wonder about
the sounds nobody hears.
01:16:48.458 --> 01:16:51.333
How does a hearing-impaired hear?
01:16:54.043 --> 01:16:57.500
I realize there isn't
one unique answer.
01:17:11.168 --> 01:17:14.750
Steps on the stones,
by the ocean.
01:17:23.375 --> 01:17:28.833
What would you say
to other hard-of-hearing children
01:17:29.458 --> 01:17:31.875
in a similar situation to you,
01:17:32.043 --> 01:17:35.793
who are bullied at school
for not hearing well?
01:17:35.958 --> 01:17:37.958
Ignore the bullies.
01:17:41.293 --> 01:17:46.125
Yes. Don't let people get to you.
01:17:47.418 --> 01:17:50.750
People will criticize you
no matter what.
01:17:50.918 --> 01:17:53.918
Maybe it's because
you're missing a leg,
01:17:54.083 --> 01:17:56.458
or because you're missing an arm.
01:17:56.625 --> 01:18:00.375
If you wear glasses or you're blind,
they'll criticize you anyway.
01:18:00.543 --> 01:18:03.418
If you dye your hair,
they'll mock on you too.
01:18:03.918 --> 01:18:06.918
People can be ignorant.
01:18:07.418 --> 01:18:09.625
So, ignore them.
01:18:20.250 --> 01:18:23.083
I'd tell them to take a chance.
01:18:23.625 --> 01:18:25.708
There's nothing more beautiful
01:18:25.875 --> 01:18:28.708
than listening
to your parents' voices.
01:18:29.168 --> 01:18:31.375
Hearing your sister's voice.
01:18:31.958 --> 01:18:34.543
Hearing all voices is nice.
01:18:54.000 --> 01:18:55.500
I also think...
01:18:55.668 --> 01:19:00.543
...although hearing loss is seen
as something bad or an ailment,
01:19:00.708 --> 01:19:02.833
in my case...
01:19:04.125 --> 01:19:08.958
it has given me
unusual insight into life.
01:19:09.125 --> 01:19:13.125
Maybe if I had had
a normal hearing...
01:19:13.668 --> 01:19:15.333
...all my life,
01:19:16.958 --> 01:19:19.333
I would be a different person,
01:19:19.500 --> 01:19:22.625
and I like having this connection
01:19:23.583 --> 01:19:25.833
with the supreme spirit,
with the mystery.
01:19:26.418 --> 01:19:28.375
If I had been born
with normal hearing
01:19:28.543 --> 01:19:30.208
maybe I would be a criminal lawyer
01:19:30.375 --> 01:19:31.543
or something.
01:19:42.458 --> 01:19:46.458
I recently brought myself to listen
to your last voice messages.
01:19:46.708 --> 01:19:48.543
You sent them 3 years ago.
01:19:48.750 --> 01:19:51.000
But your voice is intact.
01:19:55.083 --> 01:19:58.375
I was listening
to Shakira on the radio.
01:19:58.543 --> 01:20:03.043
I've sent you my own
terrible version via Whatsapp.
01:20:03.208 --> 01:20:06.375
It reminded me of you.
I was thinking about you, Charo,
01:20:07.458 --> 01:20:10.458
and when I turned the radio on
Shakira was singing,
01:20:10.625 --> 01:20:12.500
which brought me back to you
01:20:12.668 --> 01:20:15.293
dancing in front
of a mirror as a kid.
01:20:15.500 --> 01:20:17.625
I miss you so much. Bye!
01:20:19.293 --> 01:20:21.625
I really miss you too, Mom.
01:20:22.418 --> 01:20:25.208
I promise I'll dance
to Shakira more often.
01:20:42.418 --> 01:20:47.293
Each one of us relates
to the world in different ways.
01:20:50.583 --> 01:20:52.208
We understand partially.
01:20:52.625 --> 01:20:55.500
And make up for what the noise
takes from us.
01:20:56.125 --> 01:20:58.875
We visualize gestures,
atmospheres, people.
01:21:01.418 --> 01:21:03.875
We turn all that happens
into sounds,
01:21:04.208 --> 01:21:06.418
which are not the same
for those hearing.
01:21:06.875 --> 01:21:10.793
Except for those brains eager
to understand and communicate.
01:21:20.125 --> 01:21:23.708
So I hope you're somehow
hearing me somewhere.
01:21:25.875 --> 01:21:29.500
Beyond fears and all,
I understand you.
01:21:31.833 --> 01:21:34.543
I love you, Mom.
I love you very much.
01:21:42.208 --> 01:21:45.333
Written and directed by
Charo Mato
Distributor: Pragda Films
Length: 86 minutes
Date: 2021
Genre: Expository
Language: Spanish
Grade: Middle School, High School, College, Adult
Color/BW:
Closed Captioning: Available
Audio description: Available
The is title is available for licensing on the Pragda STREAM site.
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